trendymatt's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Notorious Biggie I hope you had enough supplies built up to survive the Great Diaryland Blackout of 2005. It figures that when I finally wanted to post an update, the site was down most of the weekend. Meh. First order of business, I've been nominated for a Diarist.net Site Award I like to think of myself as the Ralph Nader of the online journal world - I'll be glad to act as anybody's spoiler vote. And hey, if you honestly do think this is a good D-land site, vote for me as well. I channel Susan Lucci when I say it's been an honor just to be nominated. It seems that The Snobs have really stacked the nominations this quarter. Man, if we gave a damn what anyone else thought of us, we'd be riding high about now. And now with today's regularly scheduled entry, already in progress: Jackass sizing conventions at fast food restaurants these days drive me batshit crazy. I've had many tirades in the past over Wendy's "Small," "Biggie," and "Super Biggie" sizes, only because the people there will sass you if you dare order a medium fry. I am wholeheartedly opposed to ordering a "Biggie" anything. It just makes me sound like a tool. And don't even get me started on the nebulous realm of Super Sizes. A few months ago I found myself having a heated argument via the drive-thru intercom with some punk-ass kid who wouldn't let me order a medium fry until I would call it a "Biggie:" Me: "I'll have a classic single and a medium fry." The issue reared its ugly head on Friday afternoon as I stopped by the Burger King at the PX on Fort Knox to pick up lunch for my mom when I stopped by for a surprise visit to her office. Mom isn't a big eater, so I ordered for her the usual Whopper Jr. and small fry. Lo and behold, Burger King has jumped on the jackass sizing convention bandwagon with their new "Medium," "Large," and "King" sizes. I don't exactly recall what happened when this detail was revealed to me. What I do remember, however, is the somewhat enthusiastic round of applause that came from the four people standing in line behind me after I unleashed my Julia Sugarbaker-esque tirade upon the poor, unsuspecting girl working the counter. My fellow Burger King patrons were either highly impressed or scared enough that they felt they should appease me. Just hand over a small fry and nobody gets hurt. Got it? Good. 7:10 pm - 03.21.05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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