trendymatt's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I am not a raisin. Before we start this entry, how about some PAN-ASIAN CUISINE!!! So, yeah, it's Halloween. Woot. For the life of me, I still can't quite grasp the what the appeal of this holiday is to anyone beyond their mid teen years. I mean, most people I know are going out to drink while wearing some kind of ridiculous costume. Thank you, but I can get drunk in regular clothes just as well and not look like an ass. Well, maybe not as much of an ass. I think that my resentment for the day started early in my childhood. My mom used to go fucking nuts on Halloween. Weeks ahead of time, she would start working on my costume. I never had a store-bought costume - Mom always turned Halloween into her personal Martha Stewart project years before Martha gained popularity/notoriety. The crowning achievement of Mom's career as a seamstress was definitely the Halloween of 1988, when she made the most elaborate California Raisin costume for me, with enough purple velvet to upholster (the artist formerly known as) Prince's bedroom walls. The outfit was, admittedly, extremely well-made. She even stuffed fiber-fill between the layers of fabric and quilted raisin wrinkles all around. The thing probably took two weeks to sew. But I had to wear tights with it. Can you understand the psychological damage that happens as a result of being a nine year-old boy who was a little chubby and not that popular to begin with, being forced onto the streets of a neighborhood on an Army base while wearing black tights? And as big as the California Raisins were at the time, I'm sure it was barely cool to be dressed as a dried-up grape holding a microphone made from a toilet paper roll and a styrofoam ball. It was pure child abuse, I tell you. Social Services should have been summoned. And that was just one year of a series of Mom's crafty endeavors. I've paid my Halloween dues. 10:48 am - 10.31.03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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